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Please note that Haikuvies may contain spoilers, rough language, tasteless jokes, bad puns, and other offensive content. Reader discretion is advised. These Haikuvies have been formatted to fit your screen. Enjoy the show.

Blade Runner (1982)

June 29, 2008 - Devon Biere

Bleak dystopia
ghastly Vangelis music
I'd go off-world, too

Flying spinner cars
giant LED billboards
rain and dark and haze

Deckard, blade runner
sent to retire replicants
falls in love with one

The "skin jobs" are much
more human than the humans
light burns twice as bright

Queen to bishop 6
Roy meets his maker, who then
meets *his* maker (squish)

All those moments lost
like tears in rain... time to die
white dove flies skyward

Paper unicorn
it's too bad she won't live but
then again, who does?

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Haiku Tunnel (2001)

June 28, 2008 - Devon Biere

In San Franclisco
Josh Kornbluth plays Josh Kornbluth
lovable nebbish

Happy office temp
hello, I'm from Uniforce
I love Uni-balls

New boss Bob Shelby
high-powered tax attorney
and Prince of Darkness

17 letters
yield flood of incompetence
and paranoia

Harry Shearer in
leather S&M outfit
oh dear god my eyes

Marlina glides past
with a chilly whoosh of doom
voice mail confidante

The film's pace is one
of manic constipation
Office Space on shrooms

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This Is Spinal Tap (1984)

June 26, 2008 - Devon Biere

Mockumentary
of a rockumentary
funny and brutal

Rockers past their prime
album and ticket sales down
future... none more black

Guitar collection
these all go to eleven
see, it's one louder

18-inch Stonehenge
at severe risk of being
trod upon by dwarfs

In saddest of keys
Nigel plays a lovely piece
called "Lick My Love Pump"

Drummers succumb to
assortment of bizarre deaths
can't dust for vomit

Nuggets of wisdom
it's such a fine line between
stupid and clever

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